My sisters are both doing image-a-day advent calendars on their blogs. I'm not nearly that focused, but I did want to share a few Christmas images with you all--one of which I stole directly from empheliath's blog because I know too many people who don't read her and who would really appreciate it.

( Peektures! )
Because Christmas just isn't complete without a pin-up or two.

After experimenting with several pomegranates from a neighbor's tree, I decided that Demeter was sort of dumb if she thought Persephone didn't want to stay in the Underworld. Nobody goes "Hmmm, I'm hungry, I think I'm going to eat a fruit that comes with a padlock." Hungry people eat dates, apples, grapes, and other easy-access fruits. Determined people eat pomegranates. - Seanan McGuire by way of corvaxgirl's LJ.

This was the plan: Drink heavily, purchase tickets to see New Moon, and spend the entire length of the movie mocking it. We even snuck in some spiked sodas to prevent anything disasterous like sobering up partway through. Someone suggested that we play a drinking game, in which you take a drink every time someone makes an inappropriate facial expression or no facial expression at all. This is a fine idea if you want to go to the hospital for alcohol poisoning.

I'm reasonably certain this movie would have been unwatchable if I wasn't at least a little bit tipsy, so, if you'd like to follow our wise example, I present to you a drinking game which will NOT land you in the hospital.

The New Moon Drinking Game

Drink every time...

• Robert Pattinson or Taylor Lautner appear shirtless (if you really want to get drunk, include the rest of the wolf pack).
  
• There's a Shatnerian pause.
  
• A vampire fucking glitters.
  

In the books (which, yes, I'm ashamed to say I've read most of) the stories get more and more ridiculous and the characters get less and less likable. So taking into consideration that the source material for this movie was even worse than for the first, I think it may have been a slightly better movie*. Of course, I suffered through the first movie entirely sober, so my judgment may be a little skewed.

Kristen Stewart still has the emotional range of a plank of wood, and Robert Pattinson still makes constipation face too often (not that he's in this movie much), but Taylor Lautner was reasonably convincing, given what he had to work with. The kids playing Bella's school friends, Mike and Jessica weren't in the movie terribly much, but really owned the scenes they were in, and far outshone Stewart. There were even a few moments when I laughed, and I'm pretty sure that was the director's intention!

Visually, there was improvement as well. For starters, they ditched the blue tint they put on every shot in the first movie. And then there's the glitter.

The whole reason the Cullens live in overcast Forks is that they'd be immediately exposed as non-human by the brilliant glitter of their skin on a bright, sunny day. So Edward finally reveals this to Bella halfway through the first movie, and everyone in the audience thinks, "Um... I think you got a little glitter on you, Robert. You should talk to the make-up department." The whole glittering vampires thing is still absurd, but at least in this movie they really did stand out when the sun hit them.

Although, speaking of make-up--and I don't recall if it was like this in the first movie or not--but I would have expected make-up professionals to do better. It was like all the vampires were wearing white masks. I'm not asking a lot here. Just a little bit of neck coverage with the white face, is all.

In fact, I'm taking back my visual improvement statement. The special effects were awful. The first time you see one of the werewolves clearly, it's a big, black beast and my first thought was, "It's The Nothing!" followed quickly by, "Wait. No. The Nothing was way more convincing."

Seriously, if you're going to go see this movie, do yourself a favor: If you're not up for smuggling alcohol in, at the very least have a few drinks before you go.

*Please note that "better than really awful" is still "really fucking bad."

I've been using St. Ives Apricot Scrub since about puberty. I use other face washes sometimes as well, but that's always been my go-to product. A few months ago I bought a tub that had some "great new scent" which was cloying and awful, and I spent the first few weeks worth of showers with it mentally composing angry letters to St. Ives. But eventually I got used to it, and even made it through a second tub of the stuff.

When that tub ran out, I could only find the tubes (which cost more), but I couldn't be without my favorite face wash! But what's this? Three varieties to choose from: Renew & Firm, Blemish & Blackhead Control and Invigorating. I picked one more or less at random and took it home with me.

And it's horrible. The scrub I fell in love with... well, it scrubbed. It sloughed off dead skin and dug out black heads and really made me feel like I'd cleaned my face. The stuff I'm using right now? It's better than not washing my face, I suppose, but the gritty texture of the old scrub has been replaced by a creamy, lotion-like concoction with the odd cleansing bead thrown in.

I suppose I could try one of the other two varieties when this one runs out, but I'm beginning to feel rather disillusioned by St. Ives' attempts to re-brand and re-market this product. I fear I may have to begin the great search for a new facial scrub.

Well, I took down the Halloween decorations today. I know that most people have had theirs packed away for weeks already, but I'm never quite ready. A lot of them are things I'd keep out year round if it wouldn't take all the joy out of decorating each October. As it is Micah just spent ten minutes tormenting me by telling me I'd missed something, and then following me around as I scrutinized each room and said things like, "You're not talking about Jack, are you?" and, "You don't mean my [coffin-shaped] jewelry box, do you?"

In any case, Halloween is packed away for another year--well, more like 10 months at this point. And while I hate that Christmas seems to come earlier and earlier to department stores and malls each year, I have to admit that I'm already looking forward to it myself. It still doesn't feel like Christmas down here, and I'm coming to terms with the likelihood that it never will. But with the number of home made gifts I plan on giving and a slightly holiday-themed show coming up in just a few weeks... I have xmas on the brain, and it's kind of nice.

Today I was very grateful to work where I do and not some stuck-up, conservative office.

On his way out, one of our clients said to me, clearly excited, "Guess who's coming to Roanoke?" Who? I asked, genuinely curious. "Sarah Palin!" I promptly decided that "non-committal" was the best way to get this guy out of our office quickly and without offending a paying client.

"Wow," I replied, doing my best to sound like a person who is disinterested but still trying to be polite, rather than a person who is deeply irritated by where this conversation is headed.

Now, I don't remember exactly what he said next, but it was something to the effect of "She's an amazing woman."

I grinned (literally) and bared it, and pulled out another enthusiastic-sounding, but entirely non-committal comment. "She sure is something!"

"I'll tell you who else is something." His tone got a bit darker here, and I suddenly knew that my efforts to avoid a political argument with this total stranger had been for naught. "That president of ours. He's going to bankrupt this country."

"Ah. As opposed to our last president, who ran the national deficit up to record heights?" Wait. No. That's not what I said. It's what I thought, but it's not what I said. What I said was, "You have a good Thanksgiving, Mr. _________." Our transaction was over and I was too busy biting back what I wanted to say to come up with a direct reply that was neither fuel for the fire nor an out-and-out lie.

"Well, I can see where you stand," he grumbled at me. "He'll bankrupt the country with that health care plan of his." I smiled, told him to take care, and turned back to the work I had to do. Whether he was irritated that I disagreed with him, that I refused to be baited, or both, I'm not sure--but when he left he was still grumbling to himself and anyone that would listen about President Obama.

I know intelligent people with well-considered arguments on both sides of the health care debate, and/or who regularly vote differently than I do. I'm not opposed to an intelligent conversation on these topics with people who I trust to be well informed. Somehow, I just don't think that would have been one of those conversations.

In any case, I am grateful to work where I do, because there are only but so many offices where this sort of thing can happen, you can go tell your boss, and she'll laugh with you about what a jackass the client in question is.

_______________________________________________________________

On an unrelated note, This is the first post here in a couple of days. I'm really not doing well with this nablopomo thing.

I missed blogging yesterday. This post still marks the 17th post in 17 days, so I'm trying not to be too irritated with myself, but still.

On an unrelated note, I need to buy a hula hoop. Mom gave me the beginners Hoopnotica workout dvd for my birthday. maezr_rackham was kind enough to loan me a dvd player he's not using, so I can actually start doing my workout dvds again... but I really need a hula hoop to try this particular new one. I considered getting one from Toys R Us, but it's considerably out of my way, and I'm not entirely sure they'd have an adult sized hoop (or any hoops at all at this time of year). So naturally I turned to Amazon.

Amazon lists quite a lot of "workout" hula hoops, although the ones pictured on the dvd cover seem to just be regular hoops. They all seem to be the same rainbow-colored brand, with ridges on the inside. They look uncomfortable and at least one reviewer complained that he wound up with some nasty bruises, which had never been an issue with non-ridged hoops. Besides which, I'm fairly certain Daniel (The Jester who has mostly removed himself from the internet) said something last Wicked Faire about the ideal hula hoop to height ratio. I want to say that a hoop should, when you rest it on the floor in front of you, hit you between the pelvis and the belly button... but I may be making that up. Regardless, I want to know that I'm getting the right hoop for my height.

The Hoopnotica website sells hoops as well... and maybe if I get really into it and/or start incorporating it into performances... well then maybe I'll consider spending $40 on a hula hoop... But just at present that seems a bit absurd.

On the bright side, Hoopnotica was only one of two new workout dvds I got this year, so I should be reasonably distracted until I get a chance to figure out this hula hoop situation.

Edit, 10:01 a.m.: YourHoop.com has actually been really helpful. It still looks like I'm going to end up spending about $20 on a hoop (base price of $15, plus $2 for a 42" size, plus $2 for the heavier weight, and then, I'm sure a few bucks for shipping), which is a smidge more than I'm comfortable spending on myself until after I'm done with my holiday shopping... but at least I know I'll be getting the right size and weight--and I can even choose the color, which is nice. It'll be a plain, black hoop, but if I ever get to a point where I want to perform with it, I can always re-order and/or buy a new one.

And truthfully, Nathan Lane is growing on me as Gomez.



I'm a little concerned by Grandmama--who Tori has seen and disliked in many things--and who I found really irritating during the ten seconds she was in this video. Granted, it was the actress I was seeing, not the character... but it's not like those are entirely discrete entities.

On a similar note, I'm not entirely wild about what they've done with Wednesday, although it could work. The bit that worries me is that (per haunted_spark) they seem to be planning the same Avril Lavigne musical crap for her that Repo! gave to Shilo. For those of you who haven't seen Repo! or whose tastes differ wildly from mine, her music was horrible and jarring and sounded awful along side Sarah Brightman and Anthony Head. ...and what happened to her braids?!

In any case, the show starts up in April if I'm not mistaken, and I need to see it.

There was once a young boy whose pedagogically solemn parents resolved to do everything in their power to prevent their child from developing supersticious fears. They banned fairy tales from the household and saw to it that witches, giants and other cannibalistic fiends were never once mentioned in the child's presence. All went according to plan until one night the parents awoke to the shrill cries of their son. Startled, they rushed to his bed only to learn that he was afraid of sleeping in the dark. They were even more startled after they asked the boy why he was afraid of sleeping in the dark, for the child's answer, punctuated by sobs, was: "There's a complex hiding under my bed."

--Lutz Röhrich, "Arguemente für und gegen das Märchen"

You lack any sense of structure, character or the Aristotelian unities. --Wednesday Addams/Christina Ricci, Addams Family Values

I just saw this in one of my LJ communities and had to share:



I'm still deeply skeptical about Nathan Lane as Gomez, but I must admit he does look the part. I'm also slightly amused that with each incarnation featuring live actors the children seem to get older and older. Adam Riegler (Puglsey) appears to be about the same age that Jimmy Workman was in the movies (although he was a few years older than Ken Weatherwax was in the original TV series)... But Wednesday! In the old black and white series, Lisa Loring was only about 5 when the show started. When Christina Ricci played her in the 90's, Wednesday was not only six years older, but suddenly the older of the two children* (although the actors were about the same age). And here, Krysta Rodriguez appears to be well into her teens, at the very least. Also, am I imagining things, or have they done away with her trademark braids?

On an related note, while checking ages on IMDB, I discovered that Jodie Foster voiced "Pugsly" in the 1973 cartoon series. Random.

*In fairness, Charles Addams's comics never gave anything resembling a clear family tree (or even character names) and the movies--while taking a lot of character cues from the series--also clearly returned to the original comics for inspiration, and wrote their own version of the Addams family tree.

I was so proud of my adopted home state last November. Not only did our country elect the presidential candidate I'd thrown my weight behind, but so did Virginia. We were a swing state in that election, and we came through (as much as our options allowed) for women's and gay rights.

And then yesterday we elected Bob "I hate women and gays" McDonnell as our governor. Yes, I know his controversial thesis is 20 years old, and that he claims he's changed his mind about a lot of it. Particularly now that he's our governor, I'd really, really like to believe him... but I've seen no particular evidence to give any serious weight to this claim. (Except maybe the women in the workforce thing. I can't find it now, but I do vaguely recall some positive numbers regarding the women working on his campaign. That said, how any self-respecting woman could support a candidate who wants to take away her reproductive rights is something I've never been able to understand).

Between McDonnell's election and Maine's bigoted choice to take a giant step backwards in civil rights, and repeal their same-sex marriage laws, I'm feeling none of the buoyant optimism of last November.

I don't really have terribly much of interest to say at the moment. I spent the morning catching up on Penny Arcade and Girl Genius (which always leaves me frustrated when I get to the last posted page), and coming up with a new strength training plan.

I've been a bit of a slacker the last couple of weeks when it comes to strength training and much longer than that when it comes to cardio. The trouble with the cardio is routed in the fact that while there is a tv in my work out room, there isn't currently a DVD player. I plan on rectifying that very soon, as I just got 2 new workout dvds for my birthday, and I can't wait to try them out (I need to get a hula hoop for one of them).

I've been slacking off a bit when it comes to strength training, partially for a lack of time and partially out of boredom. I'm bored with my strength training routine, which makes me not want to find the time to do it. I spent some time this morning on Sparkpeople.com, and I have a new routine that I think will be challenging and interesting, and therefore keep me motiviated to do it.

Guest: What's wong?
Me: There's someone in both bathrooms.
Guest: Just go outside.
Me: ...I think I'll just wait.
Guest: Just go on the porch. It's raining, so everything's already wet. There's no one out there; no one will know.
Me: I'll know. It's my porch.
Guest: Shannon! It's so nice to meet you.

The party's wrapped, the guests have all gone home, the leftovers are covered and/or refridgorated as needed, and the we've swept the house for beer bottles & trash.

Micah has fallen asleep watching Pumpkinhead.

I planned to brush my teeth and follow suit, but my toothbrush is not where I left it and I'm suspicious. There was earlier evidence of someone throwing up in that bathroom (including lingering Listerine fumes) and I'm now inclined to throw the toothbrush away. More immediately, I'm inclined to find another toothbrush, and get to bed as soon as possible.

*I'm posting this via phone.

National Blog Posting Month starts Sunday. In an effort to return to my social networking roots, I WILL be participating.

But thank goodness it starts after all the Halloween madness.

baronmind and I are going out tonight to celebrate our 3rd anniversary (a day early on account of us both being huge geeks and not wanting to cancel our weekly D&D game). We're going out to Extreme Pizza for dinner and then to a comedy show featuring many of his CSZ friends. It's not a super fancy sort of celebration, but we almost never go out, just the two of us, and I'm really looking forward to it.

Tomorrow and Friday I'm off from work and I'll be cleaning, cleaning, baking, and cleaning in an effort to get ready for our annual Halloween party Friday night. Somewhere in there I should probably figure out what the hell I'm wearing to said party. Between theater, burlesque and my long-time infatuation with Halloween I have a number of options available and waiting patiently in my closet. The trouble is I like to do at least one new costume a year, and it's just not happening this year.

I had a Halloween themed show a couple of weeks ago, and my costume time/money/energy all went to it. Unfortunately, my costumes for it were not up to my regular Halloween standards--not because they were bad costumes, but because they were predictable, standard sort of Halloween costumes. I'm hesitant to show up at a Halloween party as the Bride of Frankenstein and I flat out refuse to go as a witch.

We attended a costume party last weekend, where I pulled out an old-but-gorgeous pair of monarch butterfly wings* and the black counter-part to the dress I'm wearing here (left). I love that dress, and it actually is one of the few things I own that I feel sexier in when I'm at my current size than I did when I was a few sizes smaller. It makes me feel like an old 1950s pin-up. I love it. I'm tempted to pull that out again since it is both a super sexy and super comfortable costume, but I feel a little weird wearing a costume twice in one Halloween season--particularly since I do have other costuming options.

We shall see, we shall see...

*I spent most of the evening actively not making Venture Brothers/Dr. Mrs. The Monarch references.

I dragged classytart and baronmind to go see this with me. Since I don't imagine many of you are going to fly to Edinburgh to catch this--or any other--show, I'm going to spoil the hell out of it. You've been warned.

The play begins with Wilhelm getting his panties in a twist because everyone's ruining their fairy tales and giving them happy endings. Jacob tries to calm him down, and Wilhelm storms out to change the face of modern storytelling. And... then he comes back to watch some tele with Jacob. It's not entirely clear why.

Using this as a framework, the bulk of the play is short skits in the form of adverts for imaginary products: a perfume called Greed (the Three Bears lounge about the stage whispering things like, "Greed," and "She's so greedy," while Goldilocks pouts and poses and tells how wonderful Greed is), a shampoo called Love (endorsed by Rapunzel), and most notably Altogether Insurance, the sponsor of the show the Grimms are watching (I'll get to that in a moment).

Altogether Insurance pops up a bit too much, for my tastes. Each commercial is different, but they all play on the same basic premise: The Big Bad Wolf enters, sets a scene of some sort (banana peal on the floor, sign pointing to a false short-cut, etc). Humpty Dumpty enters and gets badly injured. The Wolf re-enters (if he's left) and says, "Are you the victim of an accident that was not your fault? Altogether Insurance. You're in good hooves." It's a funny bit, but there were simply far too many of them.

Occasionally the play would return to Jacob and Wilhelm, bickering about fairy tales, and, in one case having a bit of a scuffle over the remote, that resulted in a few minutes of a Britain's Got Talent parody. The Hansel & Gretel bit was fantastic, but the rest of the parody I could have done without.

The show they were really watching was Oscar Wilde's The Nightingale and the Rose. If you've never read any of Wilde's fairy tales, for shame. This one, for you heathens who haven't read it, is an absolutely beautiful and tragic story about a student in love, who has been promised a dance with the object of his affections, if only he brings her a red rose. The Nightingale overhears him lamenting the lack of red roses in his garden and sets out to find him one. She eventually finds a bush that produces red roses, but the bush has been badly hurt by a storm and will not bloom that year. BUT, if she sings the sweetest, most beautiful song she has ever sung he can grow a rose. BUT it will only be red if, while singing this song, she stains it with her heart's blood.

To stage this, the actress playing the Nightingale and the actor playing the Rose Bush tangoed. And as the tango ramped up in intensity, the Rose Bush delivered bits of narration, largely having to do with the Nightingale pressing herself harder against the thorn and the thorn pushing deeper into her chest. I'm not going to lie. It was sexy. And I was vaguely uncomfortable about the children in the front row.

Overall, the show was really excellent, although, as mentioned above, flawed. I think there's a solid show in there, and with a little bit of tweaking, this could be a really stand-out play.

x-posted to alluringlore and told_tales

In case anyone was unaware, baronmind and I were in Edinburgh for about 5 days, visiting classytart and seeing a ridiculous amount of shows. However since I leave home again bright and early tomorrow morning for a White Elephants show in NJ, still have to rehearse both my numbers, fix a costume piece, unpack, and repack... I'll be sharing my trip with you in a bullet-ed, highlights-only sort of manner.

~Saw Micah play with Comedy Sportz Manchester. They weren't the best CSz shows I'd ever seen, but definitely a lot of fun, and lots of cool people. It was weird watching them play games I knew, but play them slightly differently than I expected. I'm sure this was even weirder for Micah.

~The first non-CSz show of the trip was The Never Man, presented by The Penny Dreadfuls (different Penny Dreadfuls--not my steampunk friends from MMRF). The show was written/directed/produced/performed by three men, who were all clearly great friends. Although a scripted comedy, there was a lot of ad libbing and general tom foolery happening on stage. The show was hilarious and brilliant and I really, really hope they come to the States so I can drag everyone I know to go see them. In the meantime I'll wear my Beef Island pin with pride.

~We saw some excellent comedians, including Reginald D. Hunter and Stephen K. Amos. Sadly, we were a week late for Dylan Moran.

~We also went to the recordings of several radio shows. Most of them were basically showcases of some of the acts performing at the fringe, but we also went to a recording of Just A Minute.

~Who's Afraid of the Brothers Grimm will get its own entry, on the basis that I can (and will) talk at great lengths about fairy tales and their adaptations. Briefly, however, Liz summed it up best as, "Flawed, but basically good."

~On one of our slightly less jam-packed days we walked around the city a bit, including up to the castle, and all throughout the Camera Obscura. Micah's posted a lot of great shots of the illusions there and of the city in his facebook, so you should go check those out.

~On our second day there we spent most of the day at a break dancing competition. First, I'd like to mention that I had no idea there was still a live and active break dancing community. Second, holy crap that's some impressive stuff. Honestly, some of the moves these guys did were basically pommel horse routines.

~Tom Thum and Sampology did a short set at the competition and we all went out and bought tickets afterward to see their full show later that week. The Tom Tom Crew have been described (they say) as a Hip Hop Circus, and while I agree with them that this description doesn't fully cover it, it's not a bad jumping off point for describing their show. Tom Thum is an amazing beat boxer, producing sounds and sound combinations that it does not seem possible a single human should be able to make. Combine that with Sam at the mixing board, Ben Walsh drumming like a maniac and about a half dozen acrobats flipping around all over stage, and you've got one hell of a show. It looks like they were in NYC earlier this year, so hopefully they'll be back in the States soon.

~I also discovered my new favorite artist ever. I desperately, desperately want a copy of Cabaret Baby, which they had in the shop where I fell in love with this guy's art... but there are only 10 copies in all the world, so it was a bit out of my price range.

~Liz was a wonderful and fun hostess. She picked out some great shows for us to see, took us to the castle and parliament and generally all around the city. I'm sure we missed some of the more tourist-y stuff, but I actually tend to prefer seeing a city through the eyes of a native. The tourist stuff can be a lot of fun too (and we definitely did some of that), but it's also really nice to know that you're being taken to the best restaurant/pub/whatever, rather than the best known. She also introduced us to some really lovely people, who we'd never have met if we were just vacationing out of brochures

~Travelling. Our flight to Edinburgh was originally going to take us from DC to NYC to Edinburgh, but wound up taking us from DC to Paris to Edinburgh. The flights home went more or less as planned, and we even got to see Tori for a bit during our obscenely long layover in NYC. Micah's Dad picked us up at the airport in DC, and we went back to the apartment and had a bit to eat with Micah's folks and his Aunt Lani before hitting the road and completing the last leg of our trip. We got home around 1am and you'd think the cats and the dog had been abandoned (rather than visited multiple times each day by maezr_rackham and nicandab) for weeks, the way they behaved.

It should go without saying, but I'm not catching up on LJ. If something important happened (and you haven't already told me), you should probably call or email me directly.

• 20:04 Back in the states, wondering WHY we're still sitting (on the plane) on the ground when we should have left an hour ago. #

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[Edit, 12:02pm: Loud Twitter's back up. Apparently. When did this happen?]

Thursday: ( Greyhound sucks, catching up with an old friend, dinner and foozball with my sister & co. )

Friday: ( Busy morning, laid back afternoon and Harry Potter )

Saturday: ( Magick Faire, family, friends and Harry Potter )

Sunday: ( Magick Faire, Manhattan and home )

Long story short, I had an amazing weekend, and I'm hoping to make it back out there for closing weekend on the 31st and 1st. It requires quite a lot of variables coming together for me, but my fingers are crossed that I can make it work.

*I am, technically, a pescatarian, not a vegetarian. I don't generally bother telling people this because a) they at least occasionally don't know what "pescatarian" means and b) I'm extraordinarily picky about the fish I eat.

First, a review of The Book of Lost Things. I enjoyed it, mostly for its take on a few classic tales, and the fairy tale format of the main story itself. That said, if you're not already a fan of fairy tales and, especially, alternative fairy tales, then this is perhaps not the book for you. The link above will take you to a full review with more details (and some spoilers), but if I wasn't already in love with the source material, I seriously doubt I would have enjoyed this book half as much as I did.

On a related note, I'll be in Oxford, CT this weekend, telling tall tales to children. And hopefully a few adults. Because children are notoriously bad tippers. ;) Seriously, though, if you're even remotely in the area, you should come check out The Midsummer Magick Faire.

I'm going to be staying in NYC and will be arriving around 1 or 2 Thursday afternoon. My sister/hostess will still be at work, and I--having been trapped on a bus all day--will probably be bored and/or hungry. You should come hang out with me.

You should also do me a huge favor and fill out this survey for my sister's marketing class. How is this a favor to me, you ask? Well, the sooner she makes significant headway on this project, the more time and attention she can spend on me while I'm visiting! So go! Click.