The Boleyn Inheritance by Philippa Gregory


My rating: 4 of 5 stars
I like Philippa Gregory's stuff, although I'm not an avid reader (it's been a few years since I read The Constant Princess and longer since I read The Other Boleyn Girl). I really enjoyed this book, but it seemed... lighter somehow. Despite Henry's habit for neglecting/beheading his wives being well-established by the time this book takes place, and despite two of the three main characters being wives four and five... The drama of the situation just didn't seem quite as intense.

Perhaps it was the lack of court intrigue. I feel like so much more of the other two books I've read (particularly The Other Boleyn Girl) focused on the politics of pleasing (or not pleasing) the king... whereas this book felt more like a romance novel set in Henry's court.

A fun book, at any rate.

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When the zombie outbreak first hit, the first to go, for obvious reasons... were the fatties. --Columbus/Jesse Eisenberg, Zombieland

We watched Zombieland last night with meg_and and Karen. baronmind and I had never seen it before, and I have to say I really enjoyed it. It struck me as being a bit inspired by World War Z, in that it was more about how these people lived/adjusted to living in a world infested by zombies, and less about a the zombie outbreak (which is, I think, a more typical zombie-movie subject). Certainly there were scenes with the heroes fighting off/being attacked by zombies and certainly they spent a lot of their time being very cautious and carrying shotguns... but that wasn't what it was about. Excellent movie, at any rate.

When Woody Harrelson made his entrance, Karen said something about loving him because he knew his acting career was a joke and took all these roles that a serious actor would never consider and so on. I bridled a little but didn't feel like starting an argument in the middle of a movie I was enjoying.

That said... I grew up watching this man on Cheers as the adorably naive (and aptly named) barman, Woody Boyd. And a year later he's a Natural Born Killer, and has worked steadily (often on fairly well-known shows and movies) since then. To be sure, he's not an A-lister, but I'd hardly call his acting career a joke. The man's up for an Oscar right now, for gods' sakes! I would kill to have an acting career that's such a joke.

*sigh*

Speaking of the Oscars, is anyone out in LJ land hosting an Oscar party? I'd be tempted, except we don't have cable and couldn't watch it. We could all get dressed up and have cocktails and talk about who we think is going to win... but we couldn't actually watch, which is a bit silly.

I had an incredibly odd dream last night.

I was a soldier in some war. In a jungle. Basically the set of Avatar: The Last Rain Forest. And it looked like we'd run the enemies into the ground, and there was a cease fire. The big wigs were convinced that we were about to seal the deal. But some of us underlings knew better. The enemies had helicopters, planes and other airborne weaponry that they were about to dump on us at any moment. We knew it was a trap.

There were people there, on the front lines with me, that I deeply cared about. My sisters, maybe. They weren't soldiers, and I kept trying to convince them to fall back as far as they could, so they'd be in the best position possible to flee for their lives. Only they didn't think my trap theory had any merit and continued to eat their lunches, right there at the forefront of it all.

I went back, deeper into the forest to commiserate with someone I knew there, in the hopes that she would have suggestions about how to convince my loved ones that they weren't safe. And that's when it happened. The 'copters and planes and airships appeared out of know where and my friend (and her whole Lookouts troop) and I took off, away from the explosions and into the forest.

I remember running in my dream, the way I think the so-called "runner's high" is supposed to feel. I remember looking down, to avoid tripping on the huge roots of the ancient trees, seeing the mossy green ground slide away underneath me, the trees--blurs of brown and green to either side. I remember feeling powerful and strong and swift, as if this were the one thing my body was truly designed to do (if only it really felt that way).

I ran so hard and so far that before I knew it, I was out of the concealing forest and in the suburbs in Germany. A glance over my shoulder told me I'd lost all but a couple of the helicopters ages ago. I hid between two buildings, hoping the shadow would conceal me. When I'd caught my breath, I left my hiding spot, and strolled--as best as I could manage--away from where I'd started. My theory being that I'd only call attention to myself by running (somehow I was in civilian clothing).

I managed to get to Berlin (which, as it turns out, was only a few blocks away). The trouble, of course, is that I was still in enemy territory (apparently), and was very clearly American. My dream-German was no better than my real German--which is to say not very good (yet), and I couldn't remember who our allies were. Not a very promising situation.

So I stopped by a hotel/brothel where I overheard two men in business suits speaking English, but they disappeared into an elevator before I could figure out how to approach them. So I talked to the Madam/receptionist (the language barrier being a non-issue, apparently) who told me they would be back. I asked if she could tell them I needed to speak to them, and she said she would. Of course, I didn't have my purse or, therefore, my phone on me, so I'm not sure how she was going to contact me. I was unnerved by this situation, but was equally uncomfortable staying in one place too long.

So I got in the elevator to go back downstairs, and bumped into liquiddatura in full Viktor gear and a handful of undefined White Elephants. Oh good, Viktor said, You got the ticket we sent you. We were worried you wouldn't make it. Utterly confused, I explained my situation to him, and he explained that the war was over, the Germans were our friends, and The White Elephant Burlesque Society was performing at an event here in Berlin. They even had a plane ticket home for me.

It was while I was fretting about the fact that I'd lost my passport--and in fact all forms of ID--along with my purse, that I woke up.

My brain does some very, very strange things when I'm not looking.

We got upwards of ten inches of snow Friday night into Saturday. It didn't interfere with our Friday night run (started late), but as of this writing our neighborhood still hasn't been plowed. Micah and I spent an hour or so this afternoon shoveling snow and putting down icy-melt (okay, he did most of the shoveling), and when we were done, he looked at me and said, "I'm ready [to go running] whenever you are."

I fussed and whined. My running shoes aren't waterproof, the boots I'm wearing aren't insulated and my feet are cold. Not to mention the idea of running alternately through snow and over ice did NOT sound like a lot of fun. With infuriating logic and patience, he pointed out to me that the snow wouldn't go away over night, and that it'd be harder to navigate the icy patches if we put off our run until tomorrow after work.

I grudgingly agreed to go running. The couch to 5k program starts each workout with a 5 minute "brisk walk" to warm you up. We didn't get quite as far in this five minutes as we usually do, and when Micah looked at his watch and said it was time to start running I whined some more. And then we started running, and between gasps for breath, I whined some MORE.

My boots aren't as comfortable as my regular running shoes. High-stepping over the snow is too much work. Whine, whine whine.

Not far from the end of our street is an elementary school and, thankfully, their parking lot and bus loop had been plowed. Instead of doing our regular route, we turned off into the cleared lot and ran a loop around it a few times. This was definitely an improvement, but I still whined that my boots were too heavy and I was wearing too many layers (and then too few).

And then, about half-way through our run, I had an epiphany. I hadn't eaten since breakfast that morning, some five hours earlier. Whoops!

It's not that I was hungry, exactly. When I'm busy or engaged in something, I don't always notice when my body needs to be refueled. (This is why projects like making an afghan or writing a story or whatever are the best weight loss tools in my arsenal.) My stomach wasn't growling. I didn't feel light-headed or anything like that. But MAN was I cranky.

I shared my realization with Micah and we both agreed that a) this was almost certainly why I was being so nasty and b) I should be fed immediately upon our return home (which I was). It's amazing how easily I can check the attitude when I know where it's coming from. I'd have to ask Micah to be certain, but I'm pretty sure I was about a hundred times more pleasant once I realized WHY I'd been so unpleasant in the first place.

That said, I'm still not a fan of running in the snow, and sincerely hope for a decent melt before we start week 5 on Wednesday.

When I looked at the run scheduled for yesterday, I thought it might kill me. We ran immediately after a brief (but intense) rock climbing session, so I was already a little tired. Even though climbing is supposed to be mostly in your lower body, I always feel it the most in my upper body. (I like to believe this speaks more for the comparative conditions of my lower and upper body than it does for my climbing form.) In any case, I was tired--my upper body especially so.

As is always the case when we run at night, I had to wrangle the dog so that Micah could handle the watch and lantern. Twitch is a 110 lb German Shepherd/Chow mix with nary an extra ounce of fat on him. He's just a BIG dog. He's also Micah's dog, and while he more or less listens to me, he's definitely more obedient to Micah. He's also--have I mentioned this before?--not leash trained.

There's been a noticeable improvement in his behavior since we first took him running about three weeks ago... but what he seems to have learned is that he's not to pull too far ahead of Micah. Which is fine on Sundays when we run in the early afternoon and Micah has the leash. This is less okay on Wednesdays and Fridays when I have the leash, because Micah's been running far longer than I have and I tend to lag behind.

Anyway, my shoulders and upper back are sore today and I'm not sure if I should blame the dog, the rock wall, or both.

The run itself was daunting, but not nearly as bad as I'd feared. I set an easy pace (on account of feeling so intimidated), but in retrospect I should have pushed a little harder. It's the first time the schedule measured ALL of the running time in full minutes, rather than seconds. It was intimidating, but, I realize now, not outside of my current abilities. Friday I'll push harder.

The Goose Girl by Shannon Hale


My rating: 4 of 5 stars
A little slow to start, but picks up significantly about 3 or 4 chapters in, after Princess Ani leaves home.

The book's entertaining, but there are no real surprises here. If you're familiar with the Brothers Grimm fairy tale on which it's based this is more a fleshing-out than an interpretation. There are no surprise twists, the story isn't told from a unique perspective... It just... well, it just fleshed out the story and made some of the more fantastic parts a touch more realistic.

The ending was a bit too pat which, I suppose, I should have expected. I mean, it was a hundreds page fairy tale. Of course it had a fairy tale ending.

These are fairly minor complaints, though, and all in all I enjoyed the book.


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This is mostly just an excuse to use my shiny new icon, but I made a post over in huzzah_icons for the first time in like a year and a half... so I thought I'd point you over there.

Back in my freshman year of college I was on an email list started by some of my friends. The purpose of this list was to play the Glad Game. corvaxgirl often posts Glad Game updates in her livejournal, but I haven't played in years. That said, I've noticed that more than a few of my friends have been unusually down this past week. So not only am I returning to the game, but I encourage all of you to join in by making similar posts in your own blogs. (That said, it's not really a game, but you should play anyway)

*Micah made me go running last night. For all I pouted and whined before and during, it really was a good thing.

*Today my scale showed me a tens digit I haven't seen in years (and which, in case you're confused about why this makes me glad, is lower than the tens digit it had been showing).

*I found the perfect faux-fur shrug on the clearance rack a couple days ago.

*There are TONS of fresh veggies in the house right now.

*I have plans to go dancing this weekend for the first time in what feels like ages.

*I bought a new notebook for food and fitness journaling. The one I'm using now is just about out of pages!

*I discovered this morning that I can get all but a few wisps of my hair into pig tails!

But after the responses to last night's twitter/FB update, I kind of wanted to share this in a more public forum:

Last night I tried to convince my boyfriend we should skip running. It was cold and rainy and on top of that my IBS was--while not the worst it's ever been--certainly not improving my mood. Thankfully, he didn't listen to me and dragged me out anyway (though we did opt to leave the dog at home this time). And I was miserable and cranky and my feet got wet and--quite frankly--I owe the man an apology.

Running last night was not fun. We were doing the Couch to 5k program, week 3, day 1. The amazing thing about this program is that at the beginning of every week you look at what you're supposed to do and think, "My gods! I can't do that--it's impossible!" And every week you do it anyway. Day 1 usually sucks, but by day 3 what's being asked of you seems pretty reasonable. And then you start a new week.

I've yet to experience the elusive and perhaps even mythical "runners high" and don't yet look forward to pounding the pavement... But the results are undeniable. Two weeks ago I would have collapsed trying to run the time I ran last night. A girl can't but feel good about that kind of change.

Micah and I came home from our run as usual. I went straight upstairs to rinse off the filth generally associated with that sort of cardio and when I came out, Micah was ensconced in the next room, poking the internet. I asked if he wanted any dinner, and after he said no, started down the stairs in order to make something for myself.

I say "started down the stairs," because I only made it down two steps before stopping dead in my tracks. A couple steps from the bottom, hanging out on the baseboard was what appeared to be an extremely large spider. I considered ignoring it. It was completely still, and spiders don't get that big in this hemisphere (I thought). Probably just an unfortunately arranged scrap of yarn or string or something... I don't have yarn that color...

"Micah!"

My dear, darling boyfriend came out into the hall and asked what was wrong. I pointed to the spidery thing on the stairs, and steeled myself to be mocked for fear of a balled up piece of yarn. ...At this moment, I'm still not really sure that I'm pleased to have been right. I may have been happier being mocked.

Micah poked at our visiting wolf spider--which of course made it skitter about, freaking me out more. Far and away, the worst thing about spiders is the eldritch way they move. Eventually he managed to catch it in a pint glass without pinching any of its legs, and, after coercing me to take a closer look, released it back outside.


(www.penny-arcade.com)

( Photos of our visitor. )

Rubeus Hagrid: Seriously misunderstood creatures, spiders are. It's the eyes, I reckon, they unnerve some folk.
Harry Potter: Not to mention the pincers...
--HPatHBP

I'm really loving my hula hoop, and hoop dance workout dvd. Hooping has quickly replaced belly dancing (which I still love) as my favorite cardio/core strengthening work out. In fact, I just came in from hooping outside. I prefer the comfort and warmth of my "workout room," but there are far too many computers in here for me to comfortably move about with the hoop.

In any case, I've also recently become obsessed with the idea of learning how to roller skate. This is undoubtedly at least partially doktor_jess's fault, since she keeps trying to get me involved with her roller derby team (an effort I'd be more susceptible to, if I had health insurance). I really want a pair of skates like these*. I figure some skates, elbow pads and knee pads (which somehow seem way less dorky with skates than they do with a bike)** and I could roller skate to work on nice days instead of walking or biking.

On an unrelated note, I hate not having access to all my user pics. Grr.

*I know those are men's skates, but the women's skates only seem to come in white with pink wheels. Can anyone actually picture me wearing that? They have more variety in "roller derby" skates, but I really like the old-fashioned, boot kind.
**To the best of my knowledge my bike helmet would work just fine with the skates.

Wonder Woman: The Complete History by Les Daniels


My rating: 4 of 5 stars
"The Complete History" is, perhaps, a bit of a misnomer. The book was engaging and informative, but somewhat limited in scope. It largely covered Wonder Woman as a pop-culture and political figure in our world, and talked only passingly about each of Princess Diana's incarnations.

I got a lot out of this book, in terms of learning about her creator, William Moulton Marston, what his aims were, and how each writer/editor that came after him tried to either live up to Marston or avoid all association with Wonder Woman's bizarre Golden Age. I learned a lot about her on screen incarnations (including the never-quite-made-it, pre-Carter version).

Despite featuring a card drawn by Bruce Timm, her on-screen exploits in Bruce Timm's version of the JLA were strangely ignored in the book. In fact, the stories she was involved in were basically ignored unless there was some sort of impact in the real world.

Nonetheless, it was a highly informative and enjoyable book.

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My sisters are both doing image-a-day advent calendars on their blogs. I'm not nearly that focused, but I did want to share a few Christmas images with you all--one of which I stole directly from empheliath's blog because I know too many people who don't read her and who would really appreciate it.

( Peektures! )
Because Christmas just isn't complete without a pin-up or two.

After experimenting with several pomegranates from a neighbor's tree, I decided that Demeter was sort of dumb if she thought Persephone didn't want to stay in the Underworld. Nobody goes "Hmmm, I'm hungry, I think I'm going to eat a fruit that comes with a padlock." Hungry people eat dates, apples, grapes, and other easy-access fruits. Determined people eat pomegranates. - Seanan McGuire by way of corvaxgirl's LJ.

This was the plan: Drink heavily, purchase tickets to see New Moon, and spend the entire length of the movie mocking it. We even snuck in some spiked sodas to prevent anything disasterous like sobering up partway through. Someone suggested that we play a drinking game, in which you take a drink every time someone makes an inappropriate facial expression or no facial expression at all. This is a fine idea if you want to go to the hospital for alcohol poisoning.

I'm reasonably certain this movie would have been unwatchable if I wasn't at least a little bit tipsy, so, if you'd like to follow our wise example, I present to you a drinking game which will NOT land you in the hospital.

The New Moon Drinking Game

Drink every time...

• Robert Pattinson or Taylor Lautner appear shirtless (if you really want to get drunk, include the rest of the wolf pack).
  
• There's a Shatnerian pause.
  
• A vampire fucking glitters.
  

In the books (which, yes, I'm ashamed to say I've read most of) the stories get more and more ridiculous and the characters get less and less likable. So taking into consideration that the source material for this movie was even worse than for the first, I think it may have been a slightly better movie*. Of course, I suffered through the first movie entirely sober, so my judgment may be a little skewed.

Kristen Stewart still has the emotional range of a plank of wood, and Robert Pattinson still makes constipation face too often (not that he's in this movie much), but Taylor Lautner was reasonably convincing, given what he had to work with. The kids playing Bella's school friends, Mike and Jessica weren't in the movie terribly much, but really owned the scenes they were in, and far outshone Stewart. There were even a few moments when I laughed, and I'm pretty sure that was the director's intention!

Visually, there was improvement as well. For starters, they ditched the blue tint they put on every shot in the first movie. And then there's the glitter.

The whole reason the Cullens live in overcast Forks is that they'd be immediately exposed as non-human by the brilliant glitter of their skin on a bright, sunny day. So Edward finally reveals this to Bella halfway through the first movie, and everyone in the audience thinks, "Um... I think you got a little glitter on you, Robert. You should talk to the make-up department." The whole glittering vampires thing is still absurd, but at least in this movie they really did stand out when the sun hit them.

Although, speaking of make-up--and I don't recall if it was like this in the first movie or not--but I would have expected make-up professionals to do better. It was like all the vampires were wearing white masks. I'm not asking a lot here. Just a little bit of neck coverage with the white face, is all.

In fact, I'm taking back my visual improvement statement. The special effects were awful. The first time you see one of the werewolves clearly, it's a big, black beast and my first thought was, "It's The Nothing!" followed quickly by, "Wait. No. The Nothing was way more convincing."

Seriously, if you're going to go see this movie, do yourself a favor: If you're not up for smuggling alcohol in, at the very least have a few drinks before you go.

*Please note that "better than really awful" is still "really fucking bad."

I've been using St. Ives Apricot Scrub since about puberty. I use other face washes sometimes as well, but that's always been my go-to product. A few months ago I bought a tub that had some "great new scent" which was cloying and awful, and I spent the first few weeks worth of showers with it mentally composing angry letters to St. Ives. But eventually I got used to it, and even made it through a second tub of the stuff.

When that tub ran out, I could only find the tubes (which cost more), but I couldn't be without my favorite face wash! But what's this? Three varieties to choose from: Renew & Firm, Blemish & Blackhead Control and Invigorating. I picked one more or less at random and took it home with me.

And it's horrible. The scrub I fell in love with... well, it scrubbed. It sloughed off dead skin and dug out black heads and really made me feel like I'd cleaned my face. The stuff I'm using right now? It's better than not washing my face, I suppose, but the gritty texture of the old scrub has been replaced by a creamy, lotion-like concoction with the odd cleansing bead thrown in.

I suppose I could try one of the other two varieties when this one runs out, but I'm beginning to feel rather disillusioned by St. Ives' attempts to re-brand and re-market this product. I fear I may have to begin the great search for a new facial scrub.

Well, I took down the Halloween decorations today. I know that most people have had theirs packed away for weeks already, but I'm never quite ready. A lot of them are things I'd keep out year round if it wouldn't take all the joy out of decorating each October. As it is Micah just spent ten minutes tormenting me by telling me I'd missed something, and then following me around as I scrutinized each room and said things like, "You're not talking about Jack, are you?" and, "You don't mean my [coffin-shaped] jewelry box, do you?"

In any case, Halloween is packed away for another year--well, more like 10 months at this point. And while I hate that Christmas seems to come earlier and earlier to department stores and malls each year, I have to admit that I'm already looking forward to it myself. It still doesn't feel like Christmas down here, and I'm coming to terms with the likelihood that it never will. But with the number of home made gifts I plan on giving and a slightly holiday-themed show coming up in just a few weeks... I have xmas on the brain, and it's kind of nice.

Today I was very grateful to work where I do and not some stuck-up, conservative office.

On his way out, one of our clients said to me, clearly excited, "Guess who's coming to Roanoke?" Who? I asked, genuinely curious. "Sarah Palin!" I promptly decided that "non-committal" was the best way to get this guy out of our office quickly and without offending a paying client.

"Wow," I replied, doing my best to sound like a person who is disinterested but still trying to be polite, rather than a person who is deeply irritated by where this conversation is headed.

Now, I don't remember exactly what he said next, but it was something to the effect of "She's an amazing woman."

I grinned (literally) and bared it, and pulled out another enthusiastic-sounding, but entirely non-committal comment. "She sure is something!"

"I'll tell you who else is something." His tone got a bit darker here, and I suddenly knew that my efforts to avoid a political argument with this total stranger had been for naught. "That president of ours. He's going to bankrupt this country."

"Ah. As opposed to our last president, who ran the national deficit up to record heights?" Wait. No. That's not what I said. It's what I thought, but it's not what I said. What I said was, "You have a good Thanksgiving, Mr. _________." Our transaction was over and I was too busy biting back what I wanted to say to come up with a direct reply that was neither fuel for the fire nor an out-and-out lie.

"Well, I can see where you stand," he grumbled at me. "He'll bankrupt the country with that health care plan of his." I smiled, told him to take care, and turned back to the work I had to do. Whether he was irritated that I disagreed with him, that I refused to be baited, or both, I'm not sure--but when he left he was still grumbling to himself and anyone that would listen about President Obama.

I know intelligent people with well-considered arguments on both sides of the health care debate, and/or who regularly vote differently than I do. I'm not opposed to an intelligent conversation on these topics with people who I trust to be well informed. Somehow, I just don't think that would have been one of those conversations.

In any case, I am grateful to work where I do, because there are only but so many offices where this sort of thing can happen, you can go tell your boss, and she'll laugh with you about what a jackass the client in question is.

_______________________________________________________________

On an unrelated note, This is the first post here in a couple of days. I'm really not doing well with this nablopomo thing.

I missed blogging yesterday. This post still marks the 17th post in 17 days, so I'm trying not to be too irritated with myself, but still.

On an unrelated note, I need to buy a hula hoop. Mom gave me the beginners Hoopnotica workout dvd for my birthday. maezr_rackham was kind enough to loan me a dvd player he's not using, so I can actually start doing my workout dvds again... but I really need a hula hoop to try this particular new one. I considered getting one from Toys R Us, but it's considerably out of my way, and I'm not entirely sure they'd have an adult sized hoop (or any hoops at all at this time of year). So naturally I turned to Amazon.

Amazon lists quite a lot of "workout" hula hoops, although the ones pictured on the dvd cover seem to just be regular hoops. They all seem to be the same rainbow-colored brand, with ridges on the inside. They look uncomfortable and at least one reviewer complained that he wound up with some nasty bruises, which had never been an issue with non-ridged hoops. Besides which, I'm fairly certain Daniel (The Jester who has mostly removed himself from the internet) said something last Wicked Faire about the ideal hula hoop to height ratio. I want to say that a hoop should, when you rest it on the floor in front of you, hit you between the pelvis and the belly button... but I may be making that up. Regardless, I want to know that I'm getting the right hoop for my height.

The Hoopnotica website sells hoops as well... and maybe if I get really into it and/or start incorporating it into performances... well then maybe I'll consider spending $40 on a hula hoop... But just at present that seems a bit absurd.

On the bright side, Hoopnotica was only one of two new workout dvds I got this year, so I should be reasonably distracted until I get a chance to figure out this hula hoop situation.

Edit, 10:01 a.m.: YourHoop.com has actually been really helpful. It still looks like I'm going to end up spending about $20 on a hoop (base price of $15, plus $2 for a 42" size, plus $2 for the heavier weight, and then, I'm sure a few bucks for shipping), which is a smidge more than I'm comfortable spending on myself until after I'm done with my holiday shopping... but at least I know I'll be getting the right size and weight--and I can even choose the color, which is nice. It'll be a plain, black hoop, but if I ever get to a point where I want to perform with it, I can always re-order and/or buy a new one.

And truthfully, Nathan Lane is growing on me as Gomez.



I'm a little concerned by Grandmama--who Tori has seen and disliked in many things--and who I found really irritating during the ten seconds she was in this video. Granted, it was the actress I was seeing, not the character... but it's not like those are entirely discrete entities.

On a similar note, I'm not entirely wild about what they've done with Wednesday, although it could work. The bit that worries me is that (per haunted_spark) they seem to be planning the same Avril Lavigne musical crap for her that Repo! gave to Shilo. For those of you who haven't seen Repo! or whose tastes differ wildly from mine, her music was horrible and jarring and sounded awful along side Sarah Brightman and Anthony Head. ...and what happened to her braids?!

In any case, the show starts up in April if I'm not mistaken, and I need to see it.